Each year as the calendar displays December, I find myself needing to pause and figure out just how I will navigate the days and weeks ahead. Do you? Do you find yourself wondering how you will get through the busyness and stress of the season? Do you anticipate the holidays with joy or dread? Have you ever stopped to ask yourself what it means for you?
After struggling for many years with the expectations this time of year, I did. I stopped to ask what it all means to me. And I took a look at those expectations and realized that all of them were self-imposed. Yes - all of them! Even though many grew out of childhood, family, religious, or societal traditions, it was still my choice whether or not I honored them in this holiday season. I asked myself: Do I want to bake cookies? Send cards? Buy gifts for everyone? Go Christmas caroling? What do these activities mean to me?
And I realized that none of it meant anything unless I did it from a place of love and inner peace. For me, if I wasn't first of all grounded in the person I want to BE, then everything I DID was both chore and meaningless. And, as a chore, I wasn't spreading love at all no matter how special my actions were. I was actually spreading tension and stress. I was at times demanding of those around me, impatient, and overwhelmed. And that simply is
not who I ever want to be.
So how could I be true to my innermost values, be the person I want to be, and enjoy the holiday season? I answered that by realizing that the most important question, perhaps the only question, to be answered is, "Who do I want to BE this holiday season?"
Each year now as December is upon us, I pause to ask who I am to be. For me, the answer is usually that I want to be love, peace, and joy. I want to be the message of Christmas and not just go through the motions of tradition which are supposed to
show you that I believe in love and peace and goodwill toward men. And immediately I am freed of the stress and expectations! I realize that I don't have to bake a single cookie or buy a single present! Peace enters my being and love fills my heart.
From this state, the miracle that happens every year includes ideas abundant for gifts that I would enjoy giving, a desire to sing Christmas carols, joy that fills me and makes it easy to make room for the holiday!
If, like me, you have a tendency to get overwhelmed and perhaps even resent the holiday season, consider asking yourself:
Who do I want to BE this holiday season?
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