If it’s never your fault …

If it’s never your fault, you can’t take responsibility for it. If you can’t take responsibility for it, you’ll always be its victim.
~ Richard Bach, Messiah’s Handbook

The essence of this quotation has been with me for a long time. I have found it very powerful. I know, it is loaded with ugly words like fault and victim. Some of you may, unfortunately, include responsibility in the ugly category. If so, I’d like to change your mind!

I suppose another way of saying the same thing might be: Continue reading “If it’s never your fault …”

Catch Yourself!

How often do you hear yourself begin a response with “I can’t … I never … I always …”?

“I never take a break when there’s a deadline.”
“I can’t do that – I’m not talented enough.”
“No, I won’t drive through town – I always take the highway.”

Scan the various areas of your life (home, parenting, relationships, work, recreation…). Listen for your inner I Never … I Can’t … I Always …”. My “favorite” such phrases have included: Continue reading “Catch Yourself!”

Energy Drains: take back your life!

Do you ever feel like:

  • you are being pulled in too many directions?
  • there is too much being asked of you?
  • YOU are responsible for that person and that activity and this …?

Is it all too much? Recently, I read The Joy of Burnout by Dr. Dina Glouberman, where she provided a visual that describes this situation beautifully:

Picture someone or something you are over invested in. Imagine that your energy is like rays, or I like to say strands of spaghetti, coming out of a hole in the top of your head. The ends of the spaghetti are stuck in that person or thing. 

My imagination traded in that spaghetti for my blood vessels and I quite literally saw my life energy flowing out of me into those others.

Pick either image, close your eyes, and feel into it for a moment.
Imagine a strand for each attachment that drains you.

Continue reading “Energy Drains: take back your life!”


We’ve all met face to face with them – the hard and fast (or soft and arbitrary) deadlines we’ve been asked to meet. Whether is’s a task at work, the child needing a ride to practice that begins in two minutes, or the self-imposed, “I should call so-and-so who is struggling.”, deadlines seems to be a non-negotiable part of life.

BUT … I am writing to suggest that we just might want to reconsider something. Really, DEADlines? How many of the things we label deadlines really are a matter of life and death? Continue reading “Deadlines!”