It’s all about relationship!

I heard this many times over the years from my husband as director of a non-profit:

It’s all about relationship!

And his aim was always to put listening, trust building, connecting — relationship — first. Relationship — before discussing treatment plans, performance issues, stuff that needed to be done.

Last week at the Fox Valley Literacy Council celebration of achievement gala, I heard it again. Continue reading “It’s all about relationship!”

Where are you a people-pleaser?

I’ve done more harm by the falseness of trying to please than by the honesty of trying to hurt. ~ Jessamyn West, writer

This quotation hit me today as I was about to journal. It seems to speak to the codependency so many suffer from. This “trying to please” isn’t about doing something kind; rather, it is about changing “me” so as not to displease “you”. Jessamyn suggests that this form of hurting others is far more pervasive than intending to cause harm “honestly”. For example: Continue reading “Where are you a people-pleaser?”

“Come From” Energy

WARNING: Today’s topic is meant to wake you up – jar you a bit – invite you into a deeper level of responsibility for how you show up in the world. Proceed with courage!

Think about a time when you have done something you didn’t want to, perhaps resentfully or grudgingly. Or, recall a time when you were physically present but emotionally and spiritually, perhaps even mentally, “out to lunch”. Or, what about those times when your reason for doing “it” was all about what you would gain – perhaps business or recognition? If it weren’t for the benefits, you so would NOT be there! 

Now, think about a time when you’ve been with someone else whose energy was at a disconnect from their “good” actions. Continue reading ““Come From” Energy”

Breathe …

How often has someone reminded you to breathe? Usually, it’s when they notice you are racing, off-balance, ungrounded, anxious and likely full of fear. When fear is dominating our thoughts and actions, it is impossible to come from, or to be, love. And love, that open, accepting embrace of self and others, is often precisely what we need more of.

Breathe with me now. Take a long, deep, full breath into your lungs. Let it go. Take another. This time, Continue reading “Breathe …”